Leading During Covid-19

I have been involved in the change business for a few decades, related to system implementations and process improvements.  The rule of thumb has always been that people do not like change, as they are comfortable in what they do, use to how things work and do not like to step outside the box.  The similar comment is when someone says that they are going to change someone else.  You cannot change someone unless they want to change.  Same holds true in the business world.  You cannot change someone; they have to be open to the potential opportunities and then make their own decision to change.  Otherwise, they will get passed over.  As time marches on, technologies move forward and enhancements will always happen.

And then came the great Disruptor – COVID-19.  The COVID came with no policies, no pamphlets and no prior examples.  There were no guidelines how to react, how to live and how to lead during a pandemic where the best preparedness is everyone living in quarantine.  The impact was felt in daily life, businesses and volunteer organizations.  As president of a synagogue, there was no one to turn to, you could not ask how was this handled beforehand.  14 weeks in and we are still learning, still adjusting and still striving to exist in this “new world.”  Things that used to be important are no longer important and things we did not think about are now in the forefront of what needs to be addressed.

A Disruptor will always lead to a change or, in this case, many changes.  Video conferencing, which ten years ago was only for “fancy” businesses has become the communication tool for households desperate to connect visually with family, friends and associates.  The way we “congregate” is different.  Wrestling over the thoughts of broadcasting religious services, business meetings or casual gatherings have been dashed aside as the use of technology has brought us together…for some as a means of inclusion and others as a means of socialization.  In terms of change…when we plan a project, we expect change to take many months.  In the COVID time, change is rapid, rapid to meet daily needs, conduct business, religious needs and social needs.  It means that people in positions of leadership are stretched to react while the Disruptor is still here, and the need to respond to its every present, constant impact on our lives, how we conduct ourselves and how we treat each other.  We can, and will, take the bucket of lemons dumped onto us and turn them into lemon-aid.  Even though this is a time of challenge, it also means that it is also a time of opportunity, which means there is change afoot.

A Time of Opportunity

Thomas Edison once said, “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.”  We are currently living in a time where most of us are home-bound due to Covid-19.  Thankfully, many of us are employed due to the wonders of modern technology.  There has been an uptick in the usage of Netflix, Hulu has offered free services and I have gotten notifications that some of the online games have added more functionality so that we have additional items to entertain us while we are home.  While I can easily agree that we need distractions (we always need these), the distractions should not become the norm and we need to remember that life around us does not stand still.

It is easy to attract people to things that require minimal effort.  Because of this, it can be easy to get lulled into this type of comfort zone.  Just because we are self-quarantined, anxious about direct human contact, or are really becoming homebodies, does not mean that we have to give up all opportunities.  We are bound within these four walls for today, but one day (or some time in the near future), we will be allowed to roam freely again.  Many people are saying that we will have to wait and see what we are allowed to do and when we will be able to do it.  With that mindset, the day we wake up and are once again allowed to “pass Go” will be the day that we are already behind.

Back to the quote from my fellow New Jerseyian, there is currently work that can be done.  While those of us who work in the world of projects, it is always good to know when the project is expected to go live.  However, if we lay out the expected tasks, we should have some idea how long tasks should take and when a viable date would be, barring any unexpected hiccups along the way (which most projects have).  Besides, after close to nine weeks being inside, it is healthy to have some goals to strive for, some projects to work on and something in the future to look forward to.  While it is easy to catch up on our shows, see the movies we never made it to and try the games that everyone talks about, now is the time to look for the opportunities.  Yes, it is dressed in overalls and looks like work, but it is better to don the garb and try your hand at the work rather than say, “I could have done that” after someone else beats you to it.

To Be or Not To Be 25 Again

During the Super Bowl, it was great to see the “Ground Hog’s Day” commercial with Bill Murray, which made sense, as both Ground Hog’s Day and the Super Bowl were on the same day.  Besides acting as a reminder to a fun movie, it was great to see the theme revisited with so much fun.  As the week progressed, it did make me think about having the opportunities to do something over, recycle a portion of my life, or just start over again.  Of course, this is merely a mental exercise, but it does make one stop and think about what if we could have a redo?  Would things turn out different or would they be the same?

Juxtaposition this with having a child that just turned 25.  While she comments on the quarter century mark, us older folk remember (although through tinted glass, aka the filters of time) where we were when we were that age.  I actual had a conversation with someone that stated that even though she is ten years older than Gab, she found a huge difference in time.  At 35, she knew where she was in life, where she wants to head and had experienced enough of life to understand things better.  At 25, she remembered not being sure of the future, still trying to “figure things out” and being a bit rudderless.  When I turned 25 (that would have been 1987), I was still living at home, was on my first adult job and was pretty much clueless on my life and where I wanted to go.  So, yeah, I would have to agree with the assessment that I heard.

What about having a chance to go back and do it all over again?  Aside from the fact that I would have my 25-year-old body and all the energy that it would bring, would I really want to go back, even with knowing what I know today?  I have gathered 32 years more of life experience, have a pretty good understanding of where I am, have a direction my life is going, and I have a great wife and family.  I am where I am based on what has happened to me and am comfortable with the results.  Would I want to go back, tamper with my success (and failures)?  To be honest, if I would end up exactly where I am at, it would be fun.  But if not…I cannot fathom a different life, a different spouse, a different family.  I am happy where I am at.  So, while repeating Bill Murray’s day over and over has some measure of fun, I am happy to have this point in life and all it has to offer.  How about you?

Leading and Delegating

As a president of an organization, I have had to ponder two concepts – leadership and delegation.


Oxford Dictionary provides the following definitions:

·         Leadership: “the action of leading a group of people or an organization.”

·         Delegate: “entrust (a task or responsibility) to another person.”

I remember as a young man, looking at various organization’s presidents, that once you reached that position, you were the one everybody had to listen to and the person that dictated every action.  As I got older, I realized that sometimes this is true and other times, not.  In truth, the role does come with the phrase that President Truman stated, “The buck stops here.”  Meaning that all the accountability, responsibility for the success of the organization at the end of the day falls on that person’s shoulders.  Leading means having the ability to know everything that is going on in the organization.  Since my synagogue is a microcosm compared to large entities, this can be an ominous task.  No one person can be involved in everything, make all decisions and action every item.  To attempt this leads to frustration and does not give a feeling of inclusion to the other people involved in leadership or the organization.

At some point I was taught the importance of delegating tasks.  This can become a fine art where you have to learn what to delegate, who to delegate to and how to engage with the person, or persons, involved.  You cannot just push responsibilities onto other people, look the other way, and hope that the tasks required are completed.  This is where relationships need to be developed as you have to be able to work with the people you ask to assist you in achieving goals.  If you delegate, you have to make sure that the person you work with has a vested interest in succeeding with the assignment, someone that you know will involve other like-minded individuals (building a team) and has the ability to communicate what happens.  Not everyone that we involve will work out as expected.

This is where the balance has to be made.  As a leader, you need to set the example, own your position and engage other people.  To do this alone, can lead to becoming a dictator where you build the expectation that you must be included in everything (i.e., managers that need to be on ALL emails), stifle creative suggestions (which all organizations need to thrive and change alongside our broader environments) and push potential help away.  Similarly, reactions where one delegates everything and takes on no responsibility, as this can lead to teams feeling they have no support, lack a broad direction and can lead to a feeling we are in the wild west.  This is the hard part, as a leader you never cede your responsibility, trust the people you ask to help, providing support and guidance, and encourage their creativity.  As General George S. Patton stated, “Don't tell people how to do things, tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results.”  

In Times of Transition

It is time for a transition.  To modify the phase from the movie “Risky Business,” “Transition happens.”  The Oxford dictionary defines transition as “…the process or a period of changing from one state or condition to another.”  I feel like I just went through a transition, now I am preparing for yet another transition and a short way down the road, there will be yet another transition.  With a transition in life, in work, in roles and in attitudes, there seems to be no end to this in sight.

As a child, I remember going to school, playing outside, playing with friends and family mystery car rides.  Yes, we had mystery car rides where our parents would pick out something to do, not tell us and off in the car we would go.  Sometimes it was an amusement park (most of those from that time are gone, like Bertram’s Island), sometimes it was to some ice cream place with an arcade, sometimes it was…I do not even remember.  One time, I swear it is true, we were driving up route 17 and they announced on the radio that the Zeiler Family was out driving on a mystery car ride.  I never figured out how my dad pulled that one off…but I digress.  Our transitions, when we were young, were the BIG EVENTS: changing schools, reaching a religious milestone (in my case, my Bar Mitzvah), or getting a first real job.

In this past year, I feel that I have been involved in many transitions – I started the year transitioning to a new company, to new roles in the company and to different clients (normal in consulting).  We watched and were part of our children’s transition from graduating college, moving back home, to job changes, to a first real job and to other interests.  As president of an organization, I have been part of some small transitions which included changing mindsets, addressing real issues (which, like change, people tend to avoid), opening new doors and within the next six months, transitioning out of this role.  They say life is like a roller coaster, pull the bar down and hang on.  Yup, I can see that.

Transitions happen like a river, forever moving forward and never giving the chance to stand still.  It is important to take advantage of this while you are still able to do so.  As we begin the last few days of 2019 and move forward into the next decade, it is time to plan out the goals and objectives for 2020.  It is a time for transition…for all of us.

Happy New Year!

Busy v Productivity

I have been hearing the word “busy” thrown around a lot lately.  It seems as if this word is very over used, whether I am hearing the word in general conversations, related to work, regarding personal lives, etc.  “You are so busy.”  “I am so busy that I do not have time for…”  “I like to keep busy.”  “They are really keeping me busy.”  I am sure that you can add a phrase or two to this list.  I do remember when I first started working, the term “busy work” was used.  This was not used as a positive term and signified giving somebody work so that they were occupied – a fancy phrase for shuffling paper. 

Does being busy mean that there is some type of result or output?  Or does “busy” mean the “busy work” of my past?  I decided that I should check with the dictionary and get a definition for the word “busy”.  Merriam-Webster defines “busy” as “engaged in action…full of activity.”  OK – between working fulltime, being president of a synagogue, being involved in my family, music, social life, etc., I can easily say that I fit the definition for “busy”.  Earlier in my career, I remember working with people who worked 9 to 5, knew the nightly television schedule, slept late on weekends and seemed to have no free time.  They said they were too busy for anything else.  This was while I was working fulltime, going to school at night and planning a wedding – who had time for television every night?

A number of years ago, I was introduced at work to Agile project management.  Not to go into details, but one of the methods they taught us was to set two-week goals and define the tasks that you can complete within that timeframe.  2 weeks = 80 working hours – time for meetings – time for “fire drills”.  That means that one’s productive time is probably closer to 50 hours a week.  I used to sit in the planning session and the participants would minimize the time for each task and load up the activities; in other words, they wanted to look busy.  The problem is that nothing would finish and they were not productive.

Merriam-Webster’s definition of “productive” is “Yielding results, benefits or profit.”

There is the old saying in geometry, all squares are rectangles, but not all rectangles are squares.  The basic definition of a rectangle is that opposite sides are parallel, the same length and it has only right angles.  A square’s definition is the same, with the only difference that the length of all sides is the same; so, by definition all squares are rectangles.  Using the same thinking, productive people can be busy, but not all busy people are productive.  So, if I go back to my busy list – am I being productive? 

·         Fulltime Work – Am I adding value to the company I work for and my clients?

·         Synagogue President – Are there results / new initiatives generated?

·         Family – Is the time spent together meaningful (quality over quantity) and will create lasting memories?

These are the questions that we all should be asking to make sure that we all live up to the potentials that we have each been given in order to best utilize our time while walking this planet (or any future planet).  I am thinking that we should minimize our use of the word “busy” and increase the use of the word “productive”.  This way, when someone talks about their output, we know that they are filling their time meaningfully and not just shuffling paper.

New Year 5780

It is once again that time of year where we wish our friends and family a sweet New Year.  It is also that time of the year, once again, where we have the opportunity to take stock in what we have accomplished, to assess the goals that have fallen short and to think about where we need to be in the upcoming year.  Some years I find that things go as planned, other years I am off the mark.  The years where things go well, I look forward to review how I did.  The other years, I look towards the review less excited but know that to get better in the future I have to go through with it.  Either way, it is that time of year.

This past year, 5779, was one of the good years!  On the personal front, Bec has graduated from college and I am now proud of both of my working girls.  Debbie and I had a great year together, working together as a couple, being supportive best friends and enjoying facing life together.  On the professional front, I have successfully changed jobs, shifting back into the consulting world and became an authorized trainer.  On the volunteer front, I am still the president of my synagogue, where I think we made a small dent in their universe and have worked towards changing peoples’ mindset.  The year was productive! 

One thing is certain – We each need to measure our successes on our own merit, our own goals and our own lives.  We are each our own person and must remember that as we review our year, we look at it through our own eyes, through our abilities and our desires.  It is easy to fall into the trap of, “I did not do as good as so-and-so,” “How come so-and-so got X while I did not,” and “I should have done, like so-and-so.”  As we look towards the next year, we should set our sights on the things we wish to accomplish, the help we wish to provide to others and the personal growth we wish to develop. 

Choose your path wisely, set reasonable goals and be diligent in following the path in front of you.

Here’s to a Meaningful, Happy, Healthy and Prosperous 5780!

And the Band Played On…

 It has been weeks…OK, it has been months since the full band has gotten together and played.  Yes, we each still play on our own to keep our fingers nimble, but to play as the whole group, now that is something special!  A bunch of middle-aged guys jamming in a basement?  Yup, that would be us, and we still work on new songs, figure out ways to play through difficult sections and most importantly, we play off each other.  What does that mean?  In the style we play, jamming can be more like a conversation, where we might start off talking about something, flow into some other area and then bring it back together.  This mean a bunch of improvising, where it is important to be able to play, but more so to listen and follow each other.  A great analogy for any group or team activity.

A project team, a committee or a sports team all have to be aware of each of the individual members and have to work together.  Just like each of these examples, in the band we do not have “positions” or “titles,” but we do have roles to play so that we do not step on each other’s toes and can complement each other’s talents.  There is the old saying, “G-d gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason.”  The key to playing in a group is the ability to listen and hear what each part is playing so that you know where everyone is going and can add value in a musical sense.  Any team or group working together has to have similar dynamics.  While in music, a discordant chard can signal an issue, in most team activities, the outcomes can fall short of expectations if everyone is not paying attention.

As with any activity where time has passed, there is some re-acquaintance that has to occur.  Whether playing or working with new people, there is always a getting to know you period.  Same when there are gaps in playing together.  We have often had reunion jams, where we play the songs that we are comfortable with and then venture off.  Like any team, it takes a bit of time to feel each other out and synch up with each other.  However, once that magical moment occurs, things begin to hit their groove and away we go.  Yes, it takes work and time to get to that point.  It is well worth the time and effort, for when we are all moving together, the magic occurs and wonder music happens.  As you can tell, I am looking forward to the reunion jam and, along with all related group activities, the wonderous outputs that we can produce.

The Meaning of Legacy?

During a recent conversation, it turned briefly about leaving a legacy.  Does not matter who I was talking to or the general reference, because after we touched on the topic, in one of those rare instances, my mind began to take off on its own direction on leaving a legacy.  What is the importance of leaving a legacy?  What really is a legacy? And, do we have a say in our personal legacies?  It was off to the races and I am sure that I nodded to the person I was speaking to as the conversation went into auto-pilot before they got distracted and moved on.  My mind, over the next few days, continued to revisit this thought though.

There was a point in time, not too long ago, where I thought that a legacy meant having your name adorning a wall somewhere to mark that you have been there.  Not unlike the old “Washington slept here” plaques that were scattered throughout the original 13 colonies.  I have recently come to realize that a name plate would only be a name attached to a list with potentially no meaning behind it.  

Years ago, a highly successful person who had many various successful careers explained success in family terms – that when the future generation see your picture over the mantlepiece, they will know that you were the one that change direction of the family to where they are today.  One of the definitions provided by Merriam-Webster Dictionary is “something transmitted by or received from an ancestor or predecessor or from the past.”  Base on this definition, the legacy is not in the name, but the actions or results of specific actions that are able to be passed from generation to generation.  In my Washington example, it might be nice to know where he rested his head at night, but we all know the impact (legacy) that Washington the man, the leader, the general, the president and, yes, thought leader left behind for all Americans.  

So, my name on a wall might only be a monument to myself.  Hopefully my children will one day point them out and say to their children, “Do you know who that is?”  I know 50-50 percent chance they will say yes.  At that point, I am just another plaque adorning a listing.  If they respond, “Is that our grandfather,” then I have left an impression more than a name.  Changing the course of future possibilities, making a HUGE dent in the universe and leaving a mark behind are all noble endeavors and things we hear people spending significant time worrying over.  I am busy spending my time focusing on the goals in front of me and accomplishing the things that I need to do.  Most importantly, I already have a legacy, whether the name Wayne Zeiler is remembered or not, in that I have a beautiful family, and if I do not dent the universe, hopefully the values and lessons Debbie and I pass on will one cause that Zeiler-down-the-line to do something truly amazing and unique.

Lifetime Juggler

Ever feel like you are that guy (or gal) who spins the plates on top of that long thin stick?  The one who’s job it is to keep spinning the plates so that nothing falls?  Yeah, you know what I mean.  Now, how many of you feel that each morning, a new set of sticks appear with those plates already in motion waiting for you to step up and keep them spinning?  Sound familiar?

Most lives are like a good play, where there are a couple of acts and within each act are multiple scenes.  Unlike a play, our lives do not move single-threaded in a sequential manner.  In other words, most people do not live their lives as a single act, one scene life.  I recently read someone’s opinion that hiding behind “I am busy” as an excuse really means that we really determine what gets our focus based on how we prioritize (aka, perceive) the tasks before us.  This makes sense as to why high-performance, successful people only focus on a small, finite set of things at a time.  Darren Hardy has told the story where Richard Branson turned down a speaking engagement for some huge, ridiculous amount of money because it was not within the two or three things he was focused on at the moment.

I try hard to have a similar discipline, but the truth is that while it sounds simple, it is not easy.  I have my family, my work with a new company and the presidency of my synagogue.   I have to juggle those three, while having some time left over to socialize (part of my down time).  Within each of those “acts”, I have a few “scenes” that need focus.  Like the plates spinning on top of the sticks, I need to plan the timing of when each item needs to be addressed.  Yes, I often get ask, “What about taking on [fill in the blank].”  Often, I have to answer “No,” because I do not want to take on anything that I will not be able to focus on.  Also, once you say “yes,” you have made a commitment to follow through.  It is better to say no, then address later (no sometimes means not now), then to fail on a commitment by not taking the time required to follow through. 

One of the things that has helped me is that each of the three acts knows about the other two and the times that I allocate for each.  Work hours are straight forward (for the most part).  Synagogue is set aside for nights (for the most part).  Family time includes dinner (most nights) and time on the weekend when everyone is around.  Although things pop up out of their time slots, I make sure that everyone knows that my family comes first.  

The Music That We Listen To

I like music, I play musical instruments, I play in a band, and, I like listening to music.  We had the chance to see 77-year-old Bob Dylan perform this week, where he played the music he wanted to in his own way.  It was great to see him doing that which he does best.  This has capped off a year of seeing performers that we have not seen before who may not have many touring years ahead of them.  There is nothing like seeing music live (i.e., without a net), and more importantly, the people perform the music that they were successful with.

Many of the musicians that we grew up listening to are 15 to 20 years older than I am.  Which means, unfortunately, that those who are still on the road performing have less time on stage before them than the careers that they blazed behind them.  Some, to use the old imagery, have traded in their instruments of choice for the hand-held harp.  I am fortunate to have seen many musicians play live (there is nothing like good live music), while there are some who I procrastinated on and will never have the opportunity to see perform live.

Twice I have dreamed of bands I will never see – Louis Armstrong and the Beatles.  As weird as that is (especially for someone who has vivid dreams), a dream will be as close as I will get to see them play.  That does not make up for the fact of not seeing them live.  In these two cases, I was way too young to see either of these before their demise.  How many times in our lives do we, however, miss the opportunities that are before us, hold off on participating while thinking that there will be a next time, or place some excuse between us and the things we strive for?

After seeing Tom Petty a few weeks before his untimely death, it became clear that the musicians we listen to will not be around forever.  Of course, this is true in all endeavors in our lives for wherever our pursuits and hobbies take us.  To make the effort, and sometimes it is an effort, to step out of our comfort zones, to strive to see whomever we wish to see, to meet the people we wish to meet, or experience the things we wish to, we need to put the time aside, make the appropriate plans and take the actions necessary; Otherwise, the day will come where the opportunity will have passed and we are left with the regret of not doing what we wanted to do.  Go out and hear that live music.  Go out and take that opportunity.  Go out and live the life you deserve. 

Inspiration Move Me Brightly

I was once taught in a seminar, by author and speaker Chris Widener, the difference between motivation and inspiration.  Motivation, he explained, was what we can bring onto ourselves or the general desire to do something; while inspiration is something that comes externally or being stimulated to do something.  His underlying point was that you cannot motivate someone else to do something, but you can inspire them to become motivated. 

I recently heard Rabbi Joseph Telushkin speak regarding thoughts on ethics.  I was inspired by his talk regarding the use of language and the meaning behind the words we use have an important impact.    This motivated me to start thinking about the words that I use and to educate myself better on this topic.  While I am generally an optimistic person, I have begun to notice whether or not the words I use communicate a positive message.  And it could be simple words or phrases I have always used.  For example, Zig Ziglar points out, in his recordings, that we refer to a traffic light as a stop light instead of a go light.  Chris Widener uses the example of waking up to an alarm (negative connotation) clock.  Rabbi Telushkin’s example was how we strive for deadlines, instead of due dates.

As a musician, I have not hidden the fact that I am in the process of teaching myself the banjo.  I have spent time listening to the great Earl Scruggs.  His breakthrough techniques elevated the instrument.  And then, I saw Bela Fleck…He provided inspiration to this fledgling banjo picker when I watched him play Chick Corea’s “Spain” (great piece on its own).  I was motivated in that the banjo, while a great rhythm instrument, can be used as a lead one as well.  Even just seeing talented musicians provides motivation for me regarding on how one can extend one’s ability to create something new (which is why I like improv).  We had a chance to see the Andy Statman Trio this past week.  Andy is a phenomenal clarinet and mandolin player (yes, I did tell him I might have to learn the mandolin next), but when coupled with drummer Larry Eagle and upright bass player Jim Whitney, the three easily produce great music, to inspire aspiring musicians.

Between Rabbi Telushkin and the Andy Statman Trio, there was a lot of inspiration flowing my way this week.  It is up to me, however, to transform that which excited me into motivation to action a takeaway for myself.  What has inspired you this past week?  Month?  Year?