The Year of the Plague

דם (Blood), צפרדע (Frogs)…as we were reciting the 10 plagues that Hashem brought upon the land of ancient Egypt during the Passover Seder, it was hard not to relate the words in the Haggadah to the pandemic that has hit 180+ countries.  As we read the words together, I looked up at the Dining Room table where I was seated with Debbie, Gab and Bec.  Last year, as in prior years, we filled the Living Room with the large gathering we have become used to for our first Seder night.  In a matter of a month, the way we handle our day to day activities, gather and communicate has significantly changed.  I never thought we would see the day where reaching out to greet a friend (hand shake, hug) would be shunned because of the potential hazardous impact.  What was once a friendly welcoming gesture is now considered inconsiderate and spurned.

About 24 years ago, my mother was dying of a different potentially deadly affliction – cancer.  I remember going to visit her in the hospital after one of her chemo treatments, where the nurses greeted us at the door and made sure that we put on hospital gowns over our clothes, covered our heads and wore gloves and a mask.  In this case, it was not to protect us, but to protect my mother, as her immune system had taken a temporary hit due to her treatment.  It was not comfortable, nor pleasant, but to visit and spend time together, we all knew what we had to do.  That year, Mom did make it to the Seder, propped up on a couch where she could hear us but was too weak to participate.  That was her last Passover.

We are once again required to wear a mask and gloves, but this time when going out to shop.  We are all practicing social distancing and found new ways to sit around the table to “visit” with out friends and families.  This means that the four of us sat at the festively decorated Dining Room table, with a place for Elijah and my laptop where family and friends joined so that we could all have a Seder together.  With a couple of tweaks, some deletions and a few additions, we were still able to have a fun, fulfilling Seder.  Our Zoom Seder still had group singing, parts for everyone to participate and some goofiness.  This included attempting to pass things between windows (it was magical) and the usual props appearing, just in a newer format.  I guess the lesson here is that we can still persevere, no matter the conditions, to get together and celebrate together. 

Like our ancestors, we will live through this plague to see another day.  We say at the end of each Seder, “Next year in Jerusalem,” this year I added, “Next year we will all be together to celebrate.”  

Gratitude Edition

Thanksgiving.  A time to be thankful.  A time to show gratitude.  A time of festive indulgence.  This is the one time of the year when we are supposed to get together, enjoy a hearty meal, watch football and get that head start on holiday shopping.  This is a national day where we are supposed to be thankful and show off our attitude of gratitude; even to the point where you might go around the dining room table broadcasting to the world what you are thankful for.

As a kid, I remember learning about the Pilgrims during this time of year. They strode forth for religious reasons, braved their way across the immensely large body of water known as the Atlantic Ocean, and lived in an unknown world inhabited by unknown people.  This hazardous journey was made by a people with conviction, commitment and cooperation who forged together for a common goal.  The celebratory meal, which is represented as our Thanksgiving meal, gives celebration to man’s endeavors to survive at all costs and ultimately to populating and becoming the great nation we live in.  I remember making buckles for our shoes, little hats for our heads and drawing hand-outlined turkeys.  It was a rich opportunity to relive a critical time in our history.

Thanksgiving is the midpoint and the evening where frantic shoppers hit the stores in search of good deals so that they can get a huge jump on their holiday gift gathering.  We all know in advance who will be having the sales and the hours stores will be open for.  In an age where online shopping is becoming the preferred way to shop, Thanksgiving is a day to be thankful that the stores and malls still exist, because that is where the deals are!  Hate to eat and run…oh, and make sure the alarm is set extra early to continue the frantic search for that special item Friday morning!

Sorry, I am not shopping.  I look forward to waking up Friday morning without setting the alarm.  Spend a little time thinking about how special the day is, what it represents and how a small band of people came to this country, a country that represents the ideals of freedom, to make a new life for themselves.  Then I will be thankful for being blessed to have my family, to spend time together, to relax and to enjoy their company.  While we should not need one day set aside to be grateful (we should be grateful every day), we should not squander that opportunity.  And then off to my brothers for the annual, the traditional Thanksgiving meal, some seasonal beverages and being thankful for the day.

…And So Ends the High Holiday Season

4 weeks and an additional 10 services across five Holidays (Rosh Hashana, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, Shemini Atzeret and Simchat Torah) has come to a close.  This is an extremely busy time of the year in the Jewish world: We start the New Year, repent, celebrate the crossing of the desert (after leaving Egypt) and receiving the Torah (we end and restart).  There have been days for fressen (Yiddish for eating like there is no tomorrow), fasting and festivities.  During these High Holy Days, we reflect, contemplate, ask for forgiveness and start over.  And then…they are over and life goes back to normal.

Or do they?  Or, should they?

Since I have been a child, these have been the days to see people who I have not seen throughout the year. Because Rose Hashanah and Yom Kippur are such important holidays, these are the few times a year that some people will go to services.  Believe me, no matter what you believe in, an opportunity to have a clean slate, spiritually, emotionally or physically is a HUGE draw! 

Some of my personal take-aways:

·      Saddest moment – We read about Moses and all the great things that he did.  He is the ultimate heroic figure in the Torah, with the ability to accomplish big feats, lead / create a nation that has endured and ultimately was very human.  This is the time where we relive his final days, and using the analogy from a Western, our favorite hero rides off into the sunset.

·     Meaningful moment – There is a portion of the Yom Kippur service called Neilah, where the Aron Kodesh (ark) remains open.  This is where the Torah “resides.”  We have a chance to stand in front, symbolically face Hashem whose presence (Shechinah) can be felt, to give our last appeals and pray for the future year, before he closes the ledger on our lives for the upcoming year.  It is a powerful moment.

I find it interesting that we focus our energies into this holiday, as every other religion does on their holiest, most meaningful days.  We all talk about living with each other, while history teaches of wiping out our enemies (so there can be no revenge).  We ask forgiveness for our actions, whether person-to-person, to a higher authority or in commitments we make to ourselves.  Yet, within a few weeks of self-reflection, feeling good about our decision and looking towards a better future, we fall back into our old ways.  “We are only human, Wayne,” is not an excuse.  Because it is easier?  I would sooner agree with that.  It is simple to commit to being better, but not easy to execute, as that means it takes work.  Remember, working towards something positive is worth the effort, provides a sense of accomplishment and inspires other.  As entrepreneur, author and motivational speaker Jim Rohn states, “Don’t wish it were easier, wish you were better.”  Here’s to being better.

Sacred Time

I recently finished reading Rabbi Abraham Heschel’s book, “The Shabbath.”  One of the concepts that he discussed in the book was Sacred Time.  In this concept, he explained that most religious items are easiest to define in terms of a sacred place where one may go to worship, or a sacred item in which humans project a sacredness to the item during prayer.  In Sacred Time, the holiness is the connection time has to a truly eternal concept.  In Genesis, chapter 2, verse 3, the translation is “And G-d blessed the seventh day and He hallowed it, for thereon He abstained from all His work that G-d created to do.”  From religious perspective, this seventh day is given as a holy day and a day of rest.  Sacred Time is taking that one day a week to stop all work and focus on the time we have.

Borrowing from this thought, and extending it beyond a purely religious precept, the idea of having a Sacred Time makes sense, in that it is important to have some span of time without work, without worrying, without technology blasting in our face, and without the rigors of daily life.  Basically – WE NEED DOWN TIME!  This is time where we can turn off our phones and computers, a time where we can sit down (without a television playing in the background) and a time to reflect. 

• We are taught that at a certain age that we can no longer nap; I like to nap on the weekends. 
• We follow the trend that if we work all week, we should shop and do errands on the weekend
• We somehow learn that going to bed early on the weekdays = staying up as late as we can on the weekends
• We learn to use every hour in our day to do “things.”

If we stop that mad carousel that we live on, we can take the time to enjoy the deep breathe, stop and smell the roses and engage in whatever metaphor you want to use.  While the Old Testament carves out a full day of Sacred Time, how many of us carve out any time during the week as a sacred period?  This could be a time to meditate, a time to reflect on ourselves (an activity some people are afraid of), a time set aside to be grateful for the “things” we are blessed with, and a time just do nothing (or nap).  Having this time set aside can be useful to put certain aspects of life in perspective, provide time to put aside conflicts to possibly give a clear picture, spend time being with someone you care about to spend time in each other’s company.  And most importantly, time away from the trappings of the advancements and technology which we use the rest of our time.  While a full day of Sacred Time would be optimal, we can at least start with some slices of our day.

It Could Have Been My Congregation

It could have been my congregation, your congregation or any other place where people meet innocently and peacefully.  Unfortunately, we fall into following the age-old mentality that when things are quiet, you tend to let your guard down…

The event of last Saturday in Pittsburgh is not only a Jewish thing.   Yes, anti-Semitism has been around seemingly forever.  Our Purim story is about a man of hate, Haman.  It is unfortunate to say, but each generation has its own Haman.  Hate, however, knows no boundaries.  It is always easier to blame someone else, rather than to own up to the wrongdoing; the most extreme is to eradicate those we despise.  This time, it was innocent Jews who were murdered; Who knows where the next act of hatred will occur?

While in Dublin last week for work, I had the opportunity to take a tour in Belfast called the Black Taxi Tour, run by Taxi Trax.  The driver was someone who was impacted by the violence in Northern Ireland, which they refer to as The Troubles.  Short history - in 1922, when Ireland became an independent Republic, part of the separation deal with England was to have the northern six counties stay part of the U.K.  The Irish there, though on the body of land called Ireland, were separate and English citizens, and treated as second-class citizens, like other downtrodden people throughout time.  The one point the driver made - it was always tit-for-tat.  You kill one of ours, now one of yours dies, whereby innocent were murdered.  In that mindset of revenge, it is easy to see how killing can escalate.

I bring this up, only to point out that an eye for eye mentality does not resolve the issue.  And not to delve into political rhetoric, but people who want to harm, people who want to destroy lives, will always find a way to do so.  Education is key.  If you teach violence as a solution, violence then becomes a valid approach to getting what one thinks they want.  If you provide an indoctrination into hatred and violence as part of the Education, those once innocent minds may never learn a better way.  Teaching tolerance, appreciation for others and the rights of individuals is important, especially in a country where most of our ancestors came for those freedoms not allowed from their countries of birth.

What can we do?  We can stand together, to show that an attack on innocent people will not divide us, but unite us.  We can teach that hate is not OK.  And, we must stand ready and not let down our guard.  Our synagogue has had an armed security guard since a thwarted fire bomb attack in 2012.  Sometimes, we wonder if we still need this deterrent.  After the events on October 27th in Pittsburgh, we now wonder if our security measures are enough.  May we remember the 11 people who had their lives taken from them and the others who have lost their lives in similar fashion. 

It could have been my congregation…

The Best Way to Enjoy the Holidays – As a Family

As the opening strains of “There’s No Seder Like Our Seder” begin, I look around the room at the family and friends that have gathered to celebrate this first night of Passover.  Both daughters came home from college for the Seders, a holiday / event that they both look forward to each year.  Do we do a traditional Seder – Yes and No.  The underlying text we use – Yes.  The method of delivery – No.  The Seder has the potential for being a stuffy affair, but not in the Zeiler household!  I learned early on that the more fun we have, the more everyone stays involved.  In the back of my mind, I still have pictured Uncle Hy, at my Mother’s parent’s house, sitting at the foot of the table, head back and snoring.  

How many time do we go to some event and it is exactly the same way it was the previously.  Yes, there is some comfort in repetition and know every step by heart.  As I get older, in a world where each day has its own challenges, there is a warm feeling of doing something by rote as a means of comfort.  That would relate to me, but what about the other people in the room?  Can I really say, “If it was good for my grandfather…”?  When the girls were little, Debbie and I started to host the Seders, but we wanted it to be accessible to our children, including them and be fun at the same time.   The Seder had to be fun for the adults as well.  We started to look for things to enhance the experience, which included song sheet, which eventually became a part of our homemade Haggadah.  Then came props, some I use, some others use.

Gab’s freshman year, we did not know if she would come home.  She came home.  This year, both Gab and Bec were not 100% sure they were coming home – they were here.  When asked what they like about coming home for the Seders?  They answered that they enjoy the company, being with family, and our own tradition.  Everyone is involved in some way or other.  This year, Bec did all of the baking.  With some new kids at our Seder, the girls included them and helped created activities for them.  We are proud that our children realize the importance of keeping everyone engaged.

Sometimes, we go through the motions of ceremonies that have been handed down, as a way to connect with our past or share our culture backgrounds with our children.  Sometimes, we need to inject a little something to make it relevant, to make it fresh and to make it exciting.  How do you make your family traditions exciting?

Spirituality

My grandfather grew up in a small village in Austria, today it would be located in the Ukraine.  Life might have been tough for a Jew in that part of the world, during the early part of the 1900’s, but, life was simpler compared to today.  I remember one of the stories that my grandfather told me revolving around religious practice.  Each Saturday morning, they would go to Shabbat services – the entire village.  Afterward, there was a meal where the community would sit facing the dais where the community’s Rabbi would speak / educate the community for hours on end.  In another story, my grandfather and his sisters would help the community in preparing for Passover – their job was to put the perforating holes in the matzo.  This was their fabric of life in Europe, not to dissimilar to the many generations that preceded them.  They lived a spiritual life, they were educated in their rituals and daily, this was their practice.  I was even told that there was a prayer when you finished in the bathroom and a blessing to wash your hands.  As Grandpa explained, this is so that we remember to do all of these things.

Are we as a population still spiritual in terms of the way that has been defined in previous generations?  Most of us have gone to some type of religious education (i.e., Sunday School) as children.  Heck!  We even sent our children.  This is a great way to learn the history, traditions and, in some cases, culture of who we are from a religious point of view.  Napoleon Hill, In Think and Grow Rich, refers to the Infinite Intelligence, his wording for a higher power.  When we pray, we ask externally for help, guidance and support.  In The Power of Myth, Joseph Campbell talks about that spiritual presence being inside us, comparing our relationship with our higher authority using the symbolism of Yin and Yang, where, conceptually, a piece or recognition of “G-d”, in a small way, has to be internal, otherwise we cannot recognize each other.

If we have any belief in the two outstanding thought providers above, do we need organized religion, the related institutions, and practices / beliefs developed thousands of years ago?  As the future president of my synagogue, I should be answering with a resounding YES.  As someone searching for answers, it might be more of a maybe?  If I commune with a “higher authority,” live a life with good morals and values, help others to achieve goals and meditate on finding a guiding path, what does organized religion offer me?  Does it provide answers?  Or, does it help us to find ourselves?  Moses, in my mind the greatest of biblical prophets, is often referred to as Moshe Rabbeinu, Moses our teacher. There is the phrase, finding one’s yogi or guru, which is a person to follow and learn from.  In both cases, these teachers provide an education on ideas and have the ability to lead their people on a guided path, which is true of most leaders that have had some revelation.

In my grandfather’s youth in Europe, society was homogeneous; there really was no secular versus non-secular until you left the village.  In Skalat, everyone was Jewish, everyone learned the same way, everyone practiced religion the same way.  It is noted that many of the religious traditions and basic ideas are taken from the different groups of ancient people, and transformed for a new peoples.  Living where I do, we are a “melting pot” of peoples, ideas and background – a great way to learn tolerance and appreciate others.  We no longer live in the Skalats of our ancestors.  It might sound like heresy, but, it just might be time to take the 1500 – 2000 year old practices and provide some updates.  Do we all need some connection to spirituality – YES.  Do we need a new way of passing on where we came from – YES.  Grandpa’s youth had no cars, no telephones, no radios, no television, and no computers.  Today, we live in a different, smaller world and we need to recognize that so that we can prepare to face tomorrow…