…And So Ends the High Holiday Season

4 weeks and an additional 10 services across five Holidays (Rosh Hashana, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, Shemini Atzeret and Simchat Torah) has come to a close.  This is an extremely busy time of the year in the Jewish world: We start the New Year, repent, celebrate the crossing of the desert (after leaving Egypt) and receiving the Torah (we end and restart).  There have been days for fressen (Yiddish for eating like there is no tomorrow), fasting and festivities.  During these High Holy Days, we reflect, contemplate, ask for forgiveness and start over.  And then…they are over and life goes back to normal.

Or do they?  Or, should they?

Since I have been a child, these have been the days to see people who I have not seen throughout the year. Because Rose Hashanah and Yom Kippur are such important holidays, these are the few times a year that some people will go to services.  Believe me, no matter what you believe in, an opportunity to have a clean slate, spiritually, emotionally or physically is a HUGE draw! 

Some of my personal take-aways:

·      Saddest moment – We read about Moses and all the great things that he did.  He is the ultimate heroic figure in the Torah, with the ability to accomplish big feats, lead / create a nation that has endured and ultimately was very human.  This is the time where we relive his final days, and using the analogy from a Western, our favorite hero rides off into the sunset.

·     Meaningful moment – There is a portion of the Yom Kippur service called Neilah, where the Aron Kodesh (ark) remains open.  This is where the Torah “resides.”  We have a chance to stand in front, symbolically face Hashem whose presence (Shechinah) can be felt, to give our last appeals and pray for the future year, before he closes the ledger on our lives for the upcoming year.  It is a powerful moment.

I find it interesting that we focus our energies into this holiday, as every other religion does on their holiest, most meaningful days.  We all talk about living with each other, while history teaches of wiping out our enemies (so there can be no revenge).  We ask forgiveness for our actions, whether person-to-person, to a higher authority or in commitments we make to ourselves.  Yet, within a few weeks of self-reflection, feeling good about our decision and looking towards a better future, we fall back into our old ways.  “We are only human, Wayne,” is not an excuse.  Because it is easier?  I would sooner agree with that.  It is simple to commit to being better, but not easy to execute, as that means it takes work.  Remember, working towards something positive is worth the effort, provides a sense of accomplishment and inspires other.  As entrepreneur, author and motivational speaker Jim Rohn states, “Don’t wish it were easier, wish you were better.”  Here’s to being better.

Passover Thoughts

“Mah Nishtana halilah ha-zeh? (מה נשתנה הלילה הזה)” is the opening to one of the first things we recite at Passover.  This is the phrase that asks the question, “Why is this night different” and sets out the tone and reason for celebrating the Passover Seder.  This is generally recited by the youngest person in the room, as it is the children that should ask the questions and the adults that recount the story towards becoming the Jewish People.  I remember those many long years ago when it was my turn to recite the questions and my father working with me to help me memorize the words and melody.  This is a tradition that has been passed down from generation to generation.  Even this year, as the “Mah Nishtana” came up, my nephew declared himself the youngest and went right into it.  As we age, these words seem to take on different meanings and each year, new family memories are made.

Even now, as an adult, I have great memories of Passover Seders long gone.  This year, my first cousin spent Passover with my father in Florida.  I remember being at my Grandfathers house with her and her brothers and the entire Zeiler clan (classic family patriarch running the Seder), and sitting at the end of the table being goofy, imitating our favorite cartoon characters and laughing.  Sometimes, my brothers and I would pull together some schtick.  I remember singing “Do You Love Me?” from Fiddler on the Roof, where I was singing the Goldie part and my brother did Tevye.  Then there was the time at my other grandparent’s house, in front of the entire family we did the Cheech and Chong routine “Cheborneck.”  This classic bit, if you have not heard before, is worth a listen.  By the time we finished, the elderly folk at the table had to pick their jaws up from the table.  We always finished the Haggadah (the book used during the Seder), but always managed to have lots of fun.

This year, when I looked up at our Seder (which I lead), as always, it is great to have new people experience our version of this tradition.  Done correctly, it is an event to remember and any first timers to a Seder, will never experience it again.  This year, most importantly, after a hectic year, with everyone in our family seemingly running all over the place, my traveling to Michigan and prepping for the holiday, it was great to have our family all in one room.  We prepared for the holiday as a family, we each add our own goofiness to the Seder and, best thing of all, we do it together as a family.  I know I have reflected on this in the past, but it is true that family time all together like this starts to be less frequent as the girls grow up.  I know, it is inevitable that they will “grow up”, move out and one day have their own families.  NO RUSH!  As long, as we continue to get together as a family for events like this, all is good.  This is where the memories that we carry with us come from and we hope to continue to make new ones for generations to come.

Spirituality

My grandfather grew up in a small village in Austria, today it would be located in the Ukraine.  Life might have been tough for a Jew in that part of the world, during the early part of the 1900’s, but, life was simpler compared to today.  I remember one of the stories that my grandfather told me revolving around religious practice.  Each Saturday morning, they would go to Shabbat services – the entire village.  Afterward, there was a meal where the community would sit facing the dais where the community’s Rabbi would speak / educate the community for hours on end.  In another story, my grandfather and his sisters would help the community in preparing for Passover – their job was to put the perforating holes in the matzo.  This was their fabric of life in Europe, not to dissimilar to the many generations that preceded them.  They lived a spiritual life, they were educated in their rituals and daily, this was their practice.  I was even told that there was a prayer when you finished in the bathroom and a blessing to wash your hands.  As Grandpa explained, this is so that we remember to do all of these things.

Are we as a population still spiritual in terms of the way that has been defined in previous generations?  Most of us have gone to some type of religious education (i.e., Sunday School) as children.  Heck!  We even sent our children.  This is a great way to learn the history, traditions and, in some cases, culture of who we are from a religious point of view.  Napoleon Hill, In Think and Grow Rich, refers to the Infinite Intelligence, his wording for a higher power.  When we pray, we ask externally for help, guidance and support.  In The Power of Myth, Joseph Campbell talks about that spiritual presence being inside us, comparing our relationship with our higher authority using the symbolism of Yin and Yang, where, conceptually, a piece or recognition of “G-d”, in a small way, has to be internal, otherwise we cannot recognize each other.

If we have any belief in the two outstanding thought providers above, do we need organized religion, the related institutions, and practices / beliefs developed thousands of years ago?  As the future president of my synagogue, I should be answering with a resounding YES.  As someone searching for answers, it might be more of a maybe?  If I commune with a “higher authority,” live a life with good morals and values, help others to achieve goals and meditate on finding a guiding path, what does organized religion offer me?  Does it provide answers?  Or, does it help us to find ourselves?  Moses, in my mind the greatest of biblical prophets, is often referred to as Moshe Rabbeinu, Moses our teacher. There is the phrase, finding one’s yogi or guru, which is a person to follow and learn from.  In both cases, these teachers provide an education on ideas and have the ability to lead their people on a guided path, which is true of most leaders that have had some revelation.

In my grandfather’s youth in Europe, society was homogeneous; there really was no secular versus non-secular until you left the village.  In Skalat, everyone was Jewish, everyone learned the same way, everyone practiced religion the same way.  It is noted that many of the religious traditions and basic ideas are taken from the different groups of ancient people, and transformed for a new peoples.  Living where I do, we are a “melting pot” of peoples, ideas and background – a great way to learn tolerance and appreciate others.  We no longer live in the Skalats of our ancestors.  It might sound like heresy, but, it just might be time to take the 1500 – 2000 year old practices and provide some updates.  Do we all need some connection to spirituality – YES.  Do we need a new way of passing on where we came from – YES.  Grandpa’s youth had no cars, no telephones, no radios, no television, and no computers.  Today, we live in a different, smaller world and we need to recognize that so that we can prepare to face tomorrow…

Meaningful Rituals

Early in my life, in fact very, I went through the ritual Brit Milah, the Jewish ceremony of circumcision.  I know there have been the outcry of many groups about the mutilation, etc., blah blah blah.  In religious terms, this signifies the covenant made between G-d and Abraham.  At eight days old, I have no recollection of the event; feel no after effects and all functions as it was intended to.  We are not the only group that goes through this ritual, there have been tribes throughout time and around the world that have this ritual, done at different points in the male life, with different meanings, and tied to different cultural stories.  Why do I open with this ritual?  As it ends up, most people know about ritual.  If I were to talk about the ritual of washing one’s feet before entering a building, you might not be able to relate.  Most importantly, the ritual is tied to a story we learn, has a meaning behind it and reminds us of who we are.

Aside from the circumcision, there are some rituals along the way of life.  In 2017, I have begun to wonder if out of the rituals that are still practiced, do they have relevance to us, do they have meaning to my children, and what purpose do they fulfill.  I understand that 2300+ years ago, a nomadic people develop the stories that helped to describe their lives and practices.  The rituals pertained to those people at the time.  In Judaism, the Torah provided the laws and base rituals.  After the Diaspora, when the Jews became dispersed into the world, the “close knit” people could no longer rely on the leadership of the country / religion. A group of people got together to, for lack of a better word, design how the religion would carry on.  New rituals, practices and understandings were added.  For the next 1800 years, this worked as designed.  In the last 150 years, the development of technology, the change in homogenization of people, and the accessibility to information and things have drastically changed the environment we live in. 

My grandfather told the story that his father came to the United States to earn the money to bring his family over.  When it was time to leave their little village of Skalat, they said goodbye to everyone they knew because of the hardship and length of travel, they expected to never again see the family and friends they were leaving behind.  Today, you hop on a plane and in six or seven hours you can cross the Atlantic.

I remember my first PC, which I bought shortly after I started working in 1985.  You had to start the 286 computer with a disc, there was 36K of memory available, Windows did not exist, and I had no dial-up ability (no internet yet).  The advances in hardware were battling the advances in software, where technology fought to improve to handle the newer programs being written in some weird game of leapfrog.  If I were to pull out the old DOS-based system, I would not be able to run the applications I rely on, communicate with the world, or…there is not or!  I would have a large paperweight taking up space.  Change was required to keep up with the environment.  Some of our rituals have gone the way of the 286 – they had a place in time, they served their original purpose, and, are not known by our children unless they are reading history books on the subject. 

I am now left with the question - How can we update our rituals to make them relevant and meaningful to the next generation?